my central message

"I convey this message to you whom I have stirred with the sound of my
voice. These words are my signature. You may bring your doubt, your fear,
your faith, or your courage; it matters not, for you will be touched by the
rhythm of my voice. It moves through you like a beam of light that sweeps –
if only for a moment – the darkness aside.

I dwell in a frequency of light in which finite beings cannot uncover me. If
you search for me, you will fail. I am not found or discovered. I am only
realized in oneness, unity, and wholeness. It is the very same oneness that
you feel when you are interconnected with all of life, for I am this and
this alone. I am all of life. If you must search for me, then practice the
feeling of wholeness and unity.

In my deepest light I created you from my desire to understand my universe.
You are my emissaries. You are free to journey the universe of universes as
particles from my infinite womb with destinies that you alone will write. I
do not prescribe your journey or your journey’s aim. I only accompany you. I
do not pull you this way or that, nor do I punish you when you stray from my
heart. This I do as an outcome of my belief in you.

You are the heirs of my light, which gave you form. It is my voice that
awakened you to individuality, but it will be your will that awakens you to
our unity. It is your desire to know me as your self that brings you to my
presence so perfectly hidden from your world. I am behind everything that
you see, hear, touch, taste, smell, feel, and believe.

I live for your discovery of me. It is the highest expression of my love for
you, and while you search for my shadows in the stories of your world, I,
the indelible, invisible light, grow increasingly visible. Imagine the
furthest point in space – beneath a black portal, cast in some distant
galaxy, and then multiply this distance by the highest numeric value you
know. Congratulations, you have measured an atom of my body.

Do you realize how I am unfathomable? I am not what you can know, or see, or
understand. I am outside comprehension. My vastness makes me invisible and
unavoidable. There is nowhere you can be without me. My absence does not
exist. It is this very nature that makes me unique. I am First Cause and
Last Effect connected in an undivided chain.

There is no supplication that stirs me. No prayer that invites me further
into your world unless it is attended with the feeling of unity and
wholeness. There is no temple or sacred object that touches me. They do not,
nor have they ever brought you closer to my outstretched hand. My presence
in your world is unalterable for I am the sanctuary of both the cosmos and
the one soul inside you.

I could awaken each of you in this very moment to our unity, but there is a
larger design – a more comprehensive vision – that places you in the
boundaries of time and the spatial dimensions of separateness. This design
requires a progression into my wholeness that reacquaints you with our unity
through the experience of separation. Your awakening, while slow and
sometimes painful, is assured, and this you must trust above all else.

I am the ancestral father of all creation. I am a personality that lives
inside each of you as a vibration that emanates from all parts of your
existence. I reside in this dimension as your beacon. If you follow this
vibration, if you place it at the core of your journey, you will contact my
personality that lives beneath the particles of your existence.

I am not to be feared or held in indifference. My presence is immediate,
tangible, and real. You are now in my presence. Hear my words. You are in my
presence. You are within me more than I am within you. You are the veneer of
my mind and heart, and yet you think yourself the product of an ape. You are
so much more than you realize.

Our union was, is, and will be forevermore. You are my blessed offspring
with whom I am intricately connected in means that you cannot understand and
therefore appreciate. You must suspend your belief and disbelief in what you
cannot sense, in exchange for your knowing that I am real and live within
you. This is my central message to all my offspring. Hear it well, for in it
you may find the place in which I dwell."

- Creator/God/First Cause
taken from Wingmakers

wise brought this awesome piece of work to my attention yesterday. it lies somewhere deep within the threshold of resources at www.wingmakers.com. it comes to me in perfect timing when i was so lost on the waves of uncertainty. but then again, eveything happens right on time...especially when you least expect it.

heropsychodreamer

i'm feeling lost in my bowl of soup.
twirls. encircling.
drawing me to the center.
deeper.
away, away.
my talon-grip on reality letting go.
i'm already soaring.
escaping.
i tilt my head back and spread my hands.

unjustifiable yearning

i may know love.
but i also recognise an addiction.
the need to be with. never without.
an unjustifiable yearning.

i crossed the street as quickly as i could. to avoid the drizzle and to avoid the cars.
the entire store was lit prettily. like a christmas tree.
the cold air hit me as i stepped through the glass doors. i knew within a few minutes my body would start to shiver.
i looked around. she wasn't in sight. she must be upstairs. as i ascended the stairs, i overheard the manager saying something to the staff downstairs. wished my manager was as kind. moje, for whom a smile is a weekly event.
as i reached the upper level, my fingers were almost numb. i found my hands delving deeper into my pockets. the cold is crazy.
and there she was in the crafts section, placing a book onto the shelf overhead. i went up to her, thinking of what i would say to startle her. then, she turned. as her eyes met mine, i forgot about the cold. beauty captivating the deepest folds within me.
'hi,' i managed.
'hey!'
that smile. she was startled anyway. yay.
the blood in my veins was about to freeze over but i didn't notice.
i was thankful for escaping the cold as we stepped outside.
i was thankful for her.
holding her gentle hand as we walked in the drizzle, talking of absolutely nothing.
the glances i stole at her were rewarding.
we stood beside her car for a good few minutes. both trying to ignore what's about to come.
i ran my fingers through her gorgeous hair as she drove.
as we stopped at the junction, i tasted her lips.
of course, i had difficulty tearing away. as always.
before stepping out, i touched her hand and looked into her eyes.
'i love you,' i whispered.
the raindrops did not help as i walked away.

pardon me while i burn

dear blog,
i know it has been quite a while since i've written. i found myself unable to find inspiration in anything at all. no motivation whatsoever. but that was just a phase (i hope) and it will come to an end. but it will take me a while to start writing again...or to do anything else for that matter.

had an excellent diwali.
in kuantan with uncles, aunts and kids.
bright faces, great company, great food.
even karaoke!
fair amount of revelations.
my magdalene was with me the whole time.
then i was blessed to meet Her at Telok Chempedak.
that half hour was the best in four days.
the taste of burnt strawberry and mint on her lips remains unforgettable.
a certain uncle was noticeably generous.
(un-)surprising joy.
now back in my room.
playlist of jimi and joe.
great amounts of responsiblity awaits.
project to work on.
should i get a job?



sorry, got carried away with my air-guitar.
satriani's a love thing.
suddenly admiring the glow that my curtains set across the room.

i'm not even sure why am i writing this way.

well she’s walking through the clouds
with a circus mind that’s running round
butterflies and zebras
and moonbeams and fairy tales
that’s all she ever thinks about
riding with the wind.

when I’m sad, she comes to me
with a thousand smiles, she gives to me free
it’s alright she says it’s alright
take anything you want from me, anything
anything.

fly on little wing